So close to where I've always wanted to be

Elliot Yamin of American Idol said in his parting video something like knowing what he was born to do, but not knowing how to get there, and that when suddenly things start to happen, it's just an amazing feeling.

It was the same feeling I have always had in seeing NASA. And yesterday, it was all happening, and it was oh so great.

Yesterday was the second day of NASA-JPL's annual open-house, where which they open their facility to the public to showcase their achievements for the past year or so. The event showcased some of the recent successful projects such as the MRO, and the somewhat older ones like the Mars Rovers. It also featured some of the current research being done at NASA, such as the aerogel, thermoelectricity, and robotics.

Oh it was oh so good. It felt like my kind of heaven, being so near to all those advancements in the human endeavor to scientific research and exploration. I was so close to the things I have always dreamt I was meant to do.

When I was younger, I was always fascinated with the stars and the cosmos that engulfs it (ok at first I was into getting filthy rich, but an Isaac Asimov book about stars and galaxies greatly changed my perspective). There were days I spent dreaming of intergalactic travel, sightseeing on Mars, developing better propulsion mechanisms. And being young then, I had believed that dreams can come true, if you only try hard enough for them.

But as Elliot has mentioned, the question has always been how to get there. I've figured that I should try hard to become great at math, science, and sex education (heheh..ok let me get away with this...what i meant was asexual reproductive cycles of microorganisms isolated in pristine non-growth conducive methane rich...ok ok..let's carry on). I've also figured that I would just have to apply a scholarship or something in some US university, excel academically, and then somehow get noticed by one of the braniacs that work at NASA. I've figured a lot of things...including the fact the maybe I might never even get to see the US.

I've always been a pessimist all my life. I don't know why, but somehow my brain got wired so wrong that I could be such a pathetic prick. I always seem to let things get the better out of me, easily, even when things should overwhelmingly have gone my way. And so, I have decided to let go this dream..and settled for more realistic things. And so I have decided to forget math, let go of science, but everyone who has been passionate about something knows that the dream does not die easily. I have somehow kept the sex education research just to keep that childhood fire alive.

It is an amazing feeling when you get what you have always wanted. It is even a more amazing feeling to suddenly find yourself, without even trying, that suddenly you are where you have always thought impossible to be in. I mean, WOW! As I went around the facility, I was awestruck with childish wonder at the things that were laid in front of me. I knew right then that yesterday, is a day I will always keep with me forever.

I have decided to pursue the dream again. It's a long term goal, a plan which will encompass about at least a decade as long as I keep strict to schedule. Most NASA missions took a very long time by the way to fruition, so I know that things you sacrifice so much for give back greatly if you are patient about it. Or not, but one has to try. One does not give up eating for the risk of choking, or space research for...errrr...whatever.

Better start going back to those math and science books. FHM and playboy, I am grateful to have never let go of. Hehehe

Romantic Creatures

Romantic Creatures.

There was this feature in Discovery Channel two years ago about spiders. It focused mostly on the mating season where which the male spiders become eaten after copulation. What I found to be funny about the feature is that the narrator said this: "His sacrifice ensures the continuity of his species for generations to come". It was funny because I really don't think the male spider saw it that way. Maybe he said: Oh, hello there spider girl...I'm here to save the species so if you don't mind let's get it on. But most likely he was simply one unlucky horny bastard.

The act is quite striking once you see the similarities in human behaviour. When one sees men leave professions, let go of dreams, or even die for the sake of women, one might begin to wonder if all males in the world be it of any specie are simply horny bastards. Ok the joke has run its course so let me ask this instead: are men really by design created to live or die according to the whims of women?

Rational creatures that we are, we have come up with terms and philosophies that make us want to charge to our doom with flowery speeches and chivalrous cries. Women have made that prospect even look nicer by inventing the words such as romantic or sweet or what-cha-ever-maka-call-its that we have become conditioned to want to hear.

O he died for me? He's so romantic. Thank you for doing this, that's so nice of you. You're such a man! (ergo, stupid?)

The Great Wall fell not because of Genghis Khan's hordes but of the tears of a beautiful courtesan. Samson lost his strength to the pretty smiles of a whore. A great Roman general fell because of Cleopatra.

Now to all the ladies reading this blog, it is not my intention to put the fair sex in a bad light. In fairness, the world has also been a better place because of you. This blog is about guys giving their all to the women (whether good or bad) they loved (lusted, obsessed, adored...what-cha-ever-maka-call-it). Now to continue...

Guys, why are we really doing this? Why is it that most of us buy into the idea of being incomplete without someone to share our lives with? And if we do have someone to share our lives with, why do we have to want to have sex with them as well? Why is it that nothing else matters but loving this person, or for the somewhat lucky unlucky horny bastards -- persons?

Why?

Let's try to keep it real this time.

The reason: we want to save the darn species.

In the words of Randy Jackson, keep it real dawg! (or spider)

Anyways, I have discovered a new pick up line. Not that it would finally work this time.